Cookie Deprivation Syndrome is Cause of Paris Hilton’s DUI’s

Doctor Maxine has discovered why Paris Hilton is in trouble? The good doctor (without even talking to the patient yet) has analyzed Paris as suffering from Cookie Deprivation Syndrome. This little known syndrome is common in the upper classes, and the results are disastrous. She did not have cookies as a child so now she is seeking relief in a bottle? Her DUI’s are a desperate cry for help!! With this stunning insight into the psyche of Paris Hilton, you are ready for a round on the morning talk shows. Have you discussed this theory yet with Dr. Phil? Why, this could be a Best Selling Book. At the very least, this deserves a seminar at the American Psychological Association annual meeting. As nutty as some of their theories are, you would probably get Cookie Deprivation Syndrome listed as a recognized mental problem. No, they would not say “problem,” it is aberration or some such watered down term for “all messed up.”

My husband would add to Cookie Deprivation Syndrome, the Meat Deprivation Syndrome. The man thinks that if there is not meat on the table with every meal, it is not a meal. He says the symptoms of the Syndrome are weak, listless behavior; lack of ability to do even the most simple household chores; and a fierce craving for anything might be classed as an animal. Fortunately M.D.S is easily cured with a 12-ounce steak, or a whole chicken, or a large cut of pork.

Chinese Roast Pork Strips are a sure cure for an attack of M.D.S. And you will notice that in keeping with my image of never cooking anything without some alcohol, it has a bit of sherry in the marinade.

Chinese Roast Pork Strips: (serves 4)

3 pound boneless pork tenderloin in one piece

Marinade:

1 teaspoon fresh ginger
2 cloves of garlic
3 tablespoons hoisin sauce
4 tablespoon dark soy sauce
1 tablespoon sherry
1 teaspoon sugar
Salt to taste–With the soy sauce this really isn’t necessary

Make up the marinade by mincing the garlic with a press, mincing the ginger with a grater, and then mixing all together in a shallow, non-metal casserole or baking dish.

Cut the pork tenderloin lengthwise into four or more long strips about 1 1/2 inches in diameter. Place the pork strips in the marinade, coat on both sides and set aside for 4 to 6 hours. Turn occasionally. Save the Marinade to baste the meat while cooking.

Grill for about an hour 3 to 4 inches from the fire on a charcoal grill, or bake or broil in the oven. Every 15 minutes baste the meat with a basting brush, and turn with tongs. Do not use a fork as this lets the juices out of the meat. The edges of the meat should be crisp and brown.

To serve, slice the pork strips into 1/4 inch slices. Serve with rice and salad.

This is an excellent Marinade for any pork, or chicken Chinese style stir-fry dish.

If you are grilling some vegetables like onions, squash, or asparagus at the same time as the pork, try brushing a little Marinade on them as well.